In our fast-moving world, the idea of slowing down can feel almost rebellious. Every day, we are surrounded by voices urging us to keep pace: new opportunities, breaking news, social events, and endless feeds of images that seem to whisper, if you’re not doing this, you’re missing out.
This quiet tug is what we’ve come to call the fear of missing out—or FOMO. It’s that uneasy feeling that life is happening somewhere else, that others are living more fully, achieving more, or simply having more fun than we are. It’s a deeply human experience, yet it can leave us restless, anxious, and unable to enjoy the life right in front of us.
But what if the antidote isn’t to chase harder, but to step gently away? What if courage looks less like running to keep up, and more like slowing down to savour the small, unmissable moments that already surround us?
The Weight of Always Keeping Up
FOMO often arrives disguised as motivation. At first, it tells us we’re staying connected, inspired, and engaged. But over time, it can drain us. The constant checking, comparing, and striving leaves little room for rest or joy.
It whispers: Don’t skip that event—you might miss a chance.
It nudges: Scroll just a little longer—you might see something important.
It warns: Say yes to everything—you never know what could happen.
And yet, what happens when our lives are built around “just in case”? Too often, our days become crowded with obligations and noise. The sweetness of presence slips away, replaced by a nagging feeling that no matter what we choose, something better is passing us by.
The truth is: no one can do it all. Every “yes” is also a “no” to something else—often, to rest, reflection, or the deeper joys of being present with ourselves and those we love.
Choosing the Courageous “No”
Slowing down requires courage because it means stepping off the well-worn path of busyness. It means saying “no” to some invitations, opportunities, and expectations—not because they’re bad, but because your energy is precious, and your time is finite.
The courageous “no” is not about shutting doors out of fear; it is about protecting the doors you truly want to walk through. It’s about recognising that missing out is not a failure, but an inevitable part of being human. And in missing out on one thing, you create space to be deeply present with another.
Imagine a summer evening where you choose not to attend the crowded gathering everyone is buzzing about. Instead, you sit on your balcony with a cup of tea, watching the sky fade from gold to deep indigo. The breeze carries the scent of jasmine, and for a few moments, time feels suspended. You are not missing out at all—you are exactly where you are meant to be.
From FOMO to JOMO: The Joy of Missing Out
In recent years, a new phrase has emerged: JOMO, the Joy of Missing Out. It’s not about indifference, but about a quiet celebration of choosing differently.
JOMO reminds us that life isn’t measured by how much we cram in, but by how deeply we experience it. It’s the simple contentment of cooking a slow meal, of reading a book without rushing, of walking barefoot through the grass while the world hurries elsewhere.
Practicing JOMO doesn’t mean withdrawing from life; it means reorienting toward what truly nourishes you. It’s an invitation to trust that you don’t have to see or do everything to live a full, meaningful life.
Gentle Practices for Letting Go of FOMO
If slowing down feels difficult, know that you are not alone. The pull of busyness is strong, and it takes practice to step aside. Here are a few gentle ways to begin:
1. Create Digital Boundaries
So much of FOMO is fueled by what we see online. Try setting small limits: perhaps a phone-free morning, or placing your device in another room while you eat. Notice how your attention softens when it isn’t constantly pulled outward.
2. Practice Intentional “Yes” and “No”
Before agreeing to plans or commitments, pause and ask: Will this nourish me, or drain me? If it feels like a rushed “yes,” experiment with a graceful “no.” You may find that your calendar begins to reflect more of your true values.
3. Reclaim Small Rituals
Slowing down doesn’t always require sweeping change. Light a candle before dinner. Step outside to watch the clouds. Write a few lines in a journal at the end of the day. These small acts anchor you in presence, reminding you that your life is happening here, not elsewhere.
4. Lean Into Nature’s Pace
Nature never rushes, yet everything unfolds. Spend time outdoors—listen to the rhythm of waves, the patience of trees, the unhurried unfolding of a flower. Let these reminders seep into your own way of being.
5. Celebrate Stillness
When you choose to rest, celebrate it rather than viewing it as wasted time. Rest is not absence; it is presence of another kind. It is the fertile soil from which creativity, clarity, and joy often grow.
The Fear Beneath the Fear
At its core, FOMO isn’t really about missing events or opportunities. It is about missing meaning. We fear that if we slow down, we will be left behind, forgotten, or somehow less alive.
But when we dare to pause, we discover the opposite: life rushes to meet us in the stillness. Meaning doesn’t arrive from chasing everything “out there.” It emerges from being here, now—attuned to the quiet wonders of an ordinary day.
The birdsong outside your window.
The warmth of a loved one’s hand.
The feeling of ink flowing across a page.
The way the afternoon light softens as it pours across your floorboards.
These are the kinds of moments we risk missing when we are too busy trying not to miss anything.
A Life Lived Deeply, Not Widely
Perhaps the most tender truth is this: we will all miss out on most things. There will always be paths not taken, experiences not had, conversations missed, and seasons that pass by. But rather than being a source of fear, this truth can be liberating.
Because if we cannot do it all, then what a gift it is to choose how we live the small portion we are given. Instead of scattering ourselves thinly across endless possibilities, we can plant ourselves deeply where it matters most.
Imagine your life not as a frantic race across countless destinations, but as a slow, steady walk through a beloved garden. You may not see everything, but you will see enough—enough to fill a lifetime with richness, gratitude, and peace.
Closing Reflections
Slowing down is not laziness. It is not missing out. It is an act of trust—trust that what matters will find you, and trust that your worth is not measured by how much you do, but by how fully you live.
The courage to slow down is the courage to live intentionally, to resist the pull of endless comparison, and to choose joy in the quiet rhythms of your own life.
So the next time FOMO whispers its anxious tune, pause. Take a breath. Remember that nothing essential can truly pass you by. The present moment is always here, patiently waiting to be noticed. And in choosing it, you may find that you’re not missing out at all—you’re finally arriving.
If you’d like to explore this more deeply, our guide on The Art of Slowing Down offers gentle practices for everyday presence.
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